I am depressed. It is high time that I concede it. I am not motivated to do anything. I don't want to work. I don't want to play. I spend as much time as possible in bed. I spend as much time as possible escaping reality by watching movies I have seen a whole bunch of times over and over again. I need to do something to pull myself out of this rut. I tried the things that I usually do when I get into a slump. I tried to reset my body clock and work different hours. I made a list of things about my work that make me want to do it. I made a frighteningly long list of things that I need to be doing to shock myself out of my lethargy. I tried to reset my mind by getting senselessly drunk and staying that way for 12 hours. All of these have worked in the past. None of them have worked now.
So, I am going to try something else that I have not tried before. Recently I posted a few thoughts about my dear ARR. What that did for me was make me realize how much I miss listening actively to him and so I went back and listened to some of his more obscure songs that I have not heard in a while, like Malargale Malargale in Love birds and Sevvaanam in Pavithra. That was one of the first active things I have done in a while. So, I thought to myself that over the holidays, I will try and post thoughts about the simple pleasures in life that when nothing else is working make life worth living, even if momentatirly. Let us hope that this does the trick.
Saturday, December 23, 2006
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